The fourth of the Advent wreath candles is lit up, and the theme is Love. Living the Catholic life is definitely harder, since the world is already corrupted with evil and secular things, and we are blinded by worldly pleasures and instant gratification. To fight this, we need to be aware at all times of the presence of God, purity of the heart, and praying much. And the sad result of worldliness is that many people only love in a selfish or self-centered way. They think they ‘love’ their friends and family, but what they refuse to admit is that it’s a selfish love. They also have the delusion that they love God, but do these ungodly things below.
We can ask ourselves:
Do I connect with my friends in the social media to appear caring about them, but at the same time, showing off my wealth, putting selfies and other pictures displaying my vanities, my gluttony with that fancy restaurant and food where my friends and I indulged, my pride with bragging those accomplishments, which stimulate envy among them?
Do I provide for my family and myself, because of my ‘love’ for them, at the expense of others who are unprivileged, committing injustice and avarice or greed to them, and at the expense of myself, by doing immoral things to climb up the career ladder?
Do I lead the person I’m in a relationship with into sin, by arousing their lust, having pre-marital sex, or tempting them to do so, which causes them to be emotionally wounded, destroying their dignity and respect? Do I stay in this type of relationship with the person and not break it off? Do I commit myself to a relationship with a person who has the capacity to make me commit sins?
Do I cheat on my spouse, and guiltlessly saying ‘It’s alright because my husband or wife doesn’t know, and I’m going home to him or her anyway.’?
Do I teach my friends and neighbors immodesty by wearing provocative clothing?
Do I influence my friends to frequent night outs to places with common occasions of sins, such as bars, and nonsense activities, which also cause sloth?
With loving oneself, and not others as well, you are stepping all over many persons, trying to feel good about yourself while sinning against others. And when you only love yourself, you get the illusion that you ‘love’ others, when you actually don’t. Jesus commanded us to “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (Mark 12:31) But the examples above are blockages to giving them true love. He also requires us to love in the manner He loved us – “This is my commandment: love one another as I love you.” (John 15:12) “Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God. Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love. In this way the love of God was revealed to us: God sent his only Son into the world so that we might have life through him. In this is love: not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as expiation for our sins.” (1 John 4:7-10) Therefore, we can just claim that we love God if we also give love to other people. It is not ‘love’ when it causes our family and friends, others to be sinful. Let us remember that if we truly love them, we also care for their soul. True love is loving their soul. We would love them in a way that we know their soul would be qualified for salvation when the time comes. And we’d also be concern whether Jesus is pleased with their actions that you yourself have influenced or driven them to do so.
Mary, on the other hand, is our role model for true love that is selfless. According to the Gospel (Luke 1:39-45), “Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste” to visit her cousin Elizabeth, instead of seeking her own comfort and security since she, too, was pregnant. We can see the act of selfless love of Mary, for the sake of another person. To Elizabeth’s surprise that being an ordinary woman she was, but got visited by the Mother of God, she exclaimed “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. And how does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?” And in these verses, we can learn that out of love of God for men, it is God Himself or Jesus in His Mother’s womb, who visited and reached out to us people first, not us to Him instead. Both the Holy Mother and Child showed us what True Love really is. Another is that there are people who can be challenging for us to love, but even it’s not easy to love them, God teaches us to still love them. This was shown when Our Blessed Mother loved God by accepting His Divine Plan for her and her Son Jesus, but at the same time, expressing her love for Him by loving others, like her old kin Elizabeth. This remained throughout her life. She loves us because we are her spiritual children.
But we are sure that we are capable of giving true love, to our loved ones and to those who are harder to love, by recalling “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) And this verse for me is so parallel with Jesus Christ visiting the humanity first. Jesus visited us first, not because He ‘needed’ love to feel complete, as God Himself is love. The reason of His visit was that He chose to become one of us as a human to be the mediator who bridged the gap of sin that separated us from God – “For there is one God. There is also one mediator between God and the human race, Christ Jesus, himself human, who gave himself as ransom for all.” (1 Timothy 2:5-6) It is our duty to extend this love God gives us to others for we are chosen by God to be His partners in plot of salvation – “For we are God’s co-workers; you are God’s field, God’s building.” (1 Corinthians 3:9) And that is right and just, because of God’s overflowing love to us – “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life.” (John 3:16)
Every single thing we do and have, it is love that gives meaning. God is love. Love is God. For why do we endure to live, or what’s the sense of living if there’s no God and when we die, we simply vanish… it’s over? Because in the end, our goal for giving love is to be able to be worthy of entering Heaven to be with all the Angels and Saints to be with God for eternity.
And the classic song “Only Selfless Love” (personal favorite) for the World Meeting of Families in the Philippines comes to my mind. Selfless Love is the true love that makes “…homes where peace and mercy reign, where faith and hope remain, where life begins, and ends in God’s embrace… Home is where true love begins. Love rejoices. Love embraces.” The last weeks, I also wrote Reflections for Hope, Peace, Joy. Selfless Love ultimately binds the first 3 themes as a whole. And the most important among them is Love.
She graduated cum laude from the University of Santo Tomas, the country's Pontifical and Catholic university, with an AB in Legal Management and minor units in Theology.
As an unmarried woman, prayer holds a central place in her daily life, with a focus on the Rosary and the Divine Office. Embodying her faith, she emphasizes the growth of her inner spiritual life, guided by the wisdom of Carmelite spirituality.
God manifested to her in a unique and radical manner, which made her know Who He truly is and led her to total surrender of her life to Him.
She has studied the Bible with her family, developing a particular fondness for the Old Testament.
Her adorable and intelligent toy poodle is a delightful companion in her daily life, bringing warmth and joy to her home.
Her hobbies include reading about everything, learning Japanese and German, listening to music and playing the flute.
In her leisure time, she enjoys gaming on PlayStation 5, Nintendo Switch OLED, Nintendo 3DS, iOS and OS, and collecting things related to PlayStation and Nintendo.
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